The life-changing luck of a lottery ticket. A genie's lantern ready to rub. The blubber-balloon boobs of Ewa Sonnet. The controls of a playboy hot tub. Of all the usual things that I, Fist, have not fingered this week, add cigarettes to the list.

So! Time for the pub and its blokes, time to stay out late, time to drink and to celebrate - perhaps with a smoke.